If you’re in early dating, don’t hesitate to have a grownup, direct conversation about his readiness to feel deep connection with another woman. And I want to thank and honor you all for sharing so thoughtfully and honestly.
10 dating tips for widows and widowers dating love online 2016
In time he will accept the new love (if not already) and love you or he will not. It is clear that she didn't really feel the same about him, without going into all the details. It's hard to admit in this kind of situation that people have tolerated such bad treatment. I feel sorry for him that he equated that with love.
I am uncomfortable with the denial and that he allowed himself to be treated so badly. It's a long process coming to terms with this kind of loss, probably hard for him to admit the gravity of her abusive ways, although imagine it's hard to hear him say anything positive about her. I have been around enough in life to have seen denial, it is a major coping mechanism. I don't treat him in any way that she did, which he does notice.
But she has not been pushing me to confront them for what they are, nor has she been trying to hammer home that things were not all that great.
I honestly think that if she were trying to do either of those, it would make me push back and result in problems between us.
If he makes her happy in countless wonderful ways, I advise that she try to understand that there can be a piece of him that still loves and honors his late wife.