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I don't want to be a stupid failure so I might as well stay in this one and just be a failure for trying." Moving on.
If these fears are not present or can be worked through, one should be able to see a clearer road ahead for moving on from a troubled relationship.
The specifics of the "second chance plan" will vary from person to person, but, in general, should include a clear "if-then" contingency: "If you can change and show me in the following specific ways for (fill in number) months, then I will consider reestablishing the relationship. This kind of self-centered response indicates that the prospects for change are weak.
If you do (blank) again, then I will end the relationship for good." If your boyfriend or girlfriend says in response, "You shouldn't put conditions on me. What if you or I want the second chance and our boyfriend or girlfriend wants to end the relationship?
There are certainly exceptions to this, but usually couples who have experienced some form of a best friendship/love relationship have a very hard time relating to each other as nondating friends.