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Silva found 19 white, straight-identifying men in rural, socially conservative regions of five Midwestern and Pacific Northwest states (Missouri, Illinois, Oregon, Washington and Idaho) through Craigslist M4M casual encounter ads. They know how to work a chainsaw and clean a dead deer.
Each of the men admitted to having sex with other men — or “bud-sex,” as Silva terms it when two guys from a rural area who identify as straight hook up.“These men genuinely identify as straight or some variation thereof,” Silva tells me. When it comes to straight men having sex, Silva says it’s important to differentiate between two groups: (1) Closeted guys who tell people they’re straight but secretly identify as gay or bisexual; and (2) Those who identify as straight but perceive their sexual identity in ways that run counter to what many people think of as straightness.
I enjoy my kids, I enjoy my wife, and enjoy my life, and I certainly wouldn’t want to change it.
I have no intention of leaving the wife for a guy or anything like that, it’s just, the guy part is just somethin’ I do. It’s hard to explain.“Sexual orientation refers to a complex combination of emotional attractions and sexual attractions, desires, fantasies and practices, whereas sexual identity refers to how individuals label and understand their sexuality.
Kevin (69): Meetin’ up with women would be cheating on my wife.